And the beat goes on…

November 17, 2009

We lost a friend a few days ago to complications after childbirth.  Who knew that still happened?  I had heard of those cases in modern times, but it still doesn’t seem real that it happened to my uber-fit friend who had such a healthy and smooth pregnancy.

I love this friend and her whole family.  Watching them begin to live with this void breaks my heart.  How do you help when you can’t do the one thing everyone wants?  Fix it.  That cannot be done.

Every day since she passed, my children still get up to play and go to school, most of the people who knew her get up and go to work or whatever it is they get up and go do.  And her husband and his family get up at all hours to care for his new daughter.  All of her family will eventually have to return to life and learn to live it without her.  I know they wonder how they will.

Tragedies happen every day to someone.  And the white noise of life continues skipping small beats.  But a small beat to the world is life grinding to a halt for a few. 

I have always believed that life is for the living, that those of us who get to stick around should live life more fully on behalf of those who are not so lucky.  In time I will try to do that, remembering her and others I’ve lost over the years.  But I think it’s going to feel very wrong.

By the way, her organs were donated and her hair donated to Locks of Love.  That was possible because her family knew she would want that done.  Please make sure your loved ones know your wishes, too.